Chewy Steaks

* Ever wondered how bad news travels faster than good news?

Here's an example:
case1

person 1 : Hey, how are you? BTW, have you met so and so lately?
person 2 : Me doing good. No I didnt meet them lately but do you know that they have split? It was not surprising for me anyway...
person 1 : stale news yaar! Actually I got it when I met their friends friend's cousin and just wanted to update myself before I meet my gang.

case 2
person 1: Hi! how are you? what news? how is so and so?
person2: Hmm...nothing much. yeah they are doing well, I guess...nothing new, only thing they are planning to buy a new car...
person1: well...lets go shopping...


*There are so many male gynaecologists around here. Why are'nt there many female andrologists?

*Why dont men wear skirts and women stick to pants alone? Both would feel comfortable, I guess.

*For centuries women have been waxing, shaving and spending oodles of moolah on cosmetics just to stay hairless. Why dont women just 'evolve' into hairless creatures? I think there is a conspiracy between the cosmetics industry and genetic engineers...

*Its inflation time!! But why is it called 'inflation' anyway when all we get is our deflated egos and lighter pockets? Well, its about money and the banks are the cynosure of the issue. So, inflation leads to 'inflated' bank's vaults. Just like our debits being the bank's 'credits'.

*Statistics show an 'alarming' rate of increase in number of singles in most countries and the reason being women choosing career over marriage, men and women bored of life-long commitment and in India woman to man ratio is dwindling owing to female feoticide. Well, its not alarming for me except for the feoticide part. Look at the brighter side, it is a way of checking population explosion.

*Most of us drool over everything American and view Americanism as ultra-modern but how come its difficult for them to have a woman or a black man to be their president while in India, Srilanka, Pakistan and Bangladesh we have had many women presidents and prime ministers. Many of them presidents/prime ministers were not fair-skinned either.

*As fuel prices are rising, India can patent the manufacture of dung cakes and biogas. We can package the cakes well (maybe vaccum packed and flavour locked) and export it. Biogas is ofcourse through pipelines which were originally meant for gas imports from Iran. Soon we might rise up above our oil producing gulf countries.

*These days talent hunt shows are outnumbering soaps as they are better tear-jerkers, with all 'emotional performances' delivered by participants and judges. Not only that, the singers are expected to even dance, emote to be the winners. They can fall flat with their singing but never on their foot-tappings. Result, a 'wholesome' entertainer on your platter. Imagine, Mohd. Rafi and Geeta Dutta acting out 'Piya tu...' ridiculous!

*We dont seem to be 'producing' many scientists in our country. My explanation : we seem to be having more coconut trees and jackfruit trees than apple trees (remember Isaac Newton). The school dropouts are sent to work and the lamp posts are already booked by urchins.