How to ward off the ram sene army on valentine's day


If you want to go out with your lady love, insist on a Prada, I mean, Parda...

Change your hangout to Sharavana Bhavan or Sukh Sagar than a Cafe Coffee day or Barista.

You may garland her but never give her a rose.

If you really want to have sometime with her, get the neighbour's kids for babysitting. Take them out to the park and call your girlfriend/boyfriend over...When you go back, do get the kids back home, we do need them next year don't we?

And why not some shopping, hmm...not at the mall, get (plead or steal) your mom's shopping bag and take your friend to the nearest vegetable market.

Always carry a camera (atleast get your kiddo brother's toy one) and if you see the Sene (the moral brigade) approaching, behave as if you are tourists, furiously taking pictures, be it the garbage bin or the public urinal and talk gibberish...

For the pub wallahs:
Wash the front of the discotheque or pub with cow dung and water and put a 'kolam'/rangoli, avoid the cupid figurines and heart shapes.

Insist on tradional wear as the theme for the night, so it would be pattu sari, plaited, well-oiled hair for girls and mundu, silk shirt for men.

Get local 'musicians' from the nearest 'kalyanamandpam', install them at the entrance and let them play till midnight.

Change the name of the waterhole eg: Amnesia can be Sri Sai Amnesia.